This week was a bit crazy for me. I don't have anything specific I want to talk about, but feel like I need to decompress from the rush of it all.
My son was sick with the stomach flu from Saturday night through Wednesday, including a short stint in the hospital. Nerve wracking, scary and one of a parent's worst nightmares. In spite of the terrible circumstances, a lot of people worked to make it a little bit better, which was much appreciated!
I felt so torn during his hospital stay because he is so little and was so scared of being there. But my daughter was at home and I ignored her completely, leaving her well being in my husband's capable hands so that I could focus on him. I only felt guilty afterwards and I don't know why. The circumstances more than supported my decision but sometimes the weight of society's "super mom" complex sits more heavily on me than usual.
On the last day that he was sick, I had to go to work and he was so sad when I told him I was leaving. He said "No, stay with me!" and my heart just broke. It was one of those crystalizing moments for me; where I realized that no matter what I think, my heart and focus is and always has been on my family and not my career.
That night I came home and since we had determined he was going to school the next day, I focused on making cupcakes for him to take with him. (Monday was his birthday, poor guy!) He was so excited when I sent cupcakes to school with my daughter for her birthday and I wanted to give him the same experience. Unfortunately, I guess his stomach wasn't 100% because he told the teacher he didn't want a cupcake, he wanted a banana! As an aunt told me when I relayed this story, I've completely corrupted him! :D
I'll end this brief note with that cute story and just say that the most difficult of circumstances are when we see our true selves most clearly.
Friday, May 4, 2012
Thursday, February 16, 2012
Healthy Achievements
I've been on a relatively strict diet for about 6 weeks now and have lost about 13 pounds. (Still have about 12-17 more to go but it's a good start in my opinion!). It's not strict in that it restricts what you can eat, it simply counts your calories. What I realized after years of researching and trying diets is that they ALL revolve around calorie intake ultimately.
I approached this idea thinking that it's simplicity would make it easier to follow through on. It is easier to track how I'm eating for a day (I use the myfitnesspal.com app - highly recommend!) because there is no advanced math or conversion to another tracking system necessary. It didn't really change how difficult it is to start a new diet though.
For the first two weeks I was hungry all the time and in a bad mood because of it. I quickly realized that I couldn't eat the way I had been and simply reduce my calorie intake. My diet was peppered with junk food, snacking and no portion control. I've been too afraid to sit down and track it but I think I was consuming around 2,500-3,000 calories a day. Going from that to 1,200 calories was a struggle to say the least! I knew it would be impossible if I didn't change my eating habits as well.
I started making a large pot of vegetable soup on Sunday every week. I'd eat a bowl of soup with a chicken cutlet or an 100 calorie english muffin for lunch 3 days a week. I also started thinking outside the box for ways to increase my fruit and vegetable consumption. I'd make two scrambled eggs and put them over a bed of steamed broccoli and cauliflower. For a snack, I'd have an apple with a tablespoon of reduced fat peanut butter. Once I started changing my eating habits, it became easier to stay within my calorie guidelines and feel full.
I also became highly aware of portion size. Most chicken recipes say a portion is 3 or 4 ounces but one cutlet is usually 6-8 ounces from our brand. I started becoming strict about measuring out portions when I realized how many calories you can inadvertently eat by not watching your portion size.
I also realized how many calories we consume in drinks. Juices are VERY high in calories and don't offer most of the benefits a fresh fruit does. Soda is also extremely high in calories! When you are drinking your 64 ounces of liquid as soda or juice, that is a lot of extra calories. I started mixing 1/2 water and 1/2 Gatorade or Vitamin Water to get my water intake up while keeping the calories down.
The most important thing I started doing was cheating. I know that is usually a bad thing to do but when I look bad on my dieting attempts, I realized there is a common reaction. After about two weeks, I start to feel deprived, cheat and then feel so awful that I stop dieting altogether! Once I realized that this was my pattern, I decided to build "safe cheating" into the diet to protect myself from feeling deprived. It's very simple. I don't count calories on Saturdays. I eat dessert on those days and don't feel guilty. What I noticed is that because I eat so healthy the rest of the week, it spills over into Saturdays. My cravings for junk food are reduced and one day of desserts is fine. It hasn't hindered my weight loss and keeps me from falling off the wagon.
All in all, I'm proud of myself for hanging in this far and truly believe I can achieve my weight loss goals now!
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
I approached this idea thinking that it's simplicity would make it easier to follow through on. It is easier to track how I'm eating for a day (I use the myfitnesspal.com app - highly recommend!) because there is no advanced math or conversion to another tracking system necessary. It didn't really change how difficult it is to start a new diet though.
For the first two weeks I was hungry all the time and in a bad mood because of it. I quickly realized that I couldn't eat the way I had been and simply reduce my calorie intake. My diet was peppered with junk food, snacking and no portion control. I've been too afraid to sit down and track it but I think I was consuming around 2,500-3,000 calories a day. Going from that to 1,200 calories was a struggle to say the least! I knew it would be impossible if I didn't change my eating habits as well.
I started making a large pot of vegetable soup on Sunday every week. I'd eat a bowl of soup with a chicken cutlet or an 100 calorie english muffin for lunch 3 days a week. I also started thinking outside the box for ways to increase my fruit and vegetable consumption. I'd make two scrambled eggs and put them over a bed of steamed broccoli and cauliflower. For a snack, I'd have an apple with a tablespoon of reduced fat peanut butter. Once I started changing my eating habits, it became easier to stay within my calorie guidelines and feel full.
I also became highly aware of portion size. Most chicken recipes say a portion is 3 or 4 ounces but one cutlet is usually 6-8 ounces from our brand. I started becoming strict about measuring out portions when I realized how many calories you can inadvertently eat by not watching your portion size.
I also realized how many calories we consume in drinks. Juices are VERY high in calories and don't offer most of the benefits a fresh fruit does. Soda is also extremely high in calories! When you are drinking your 64 ounces of liquid as soda or juice, that is a lot of extra calories. I started mixing 1/2 water and 1/2 Gatorade or Vitamin Water to get my water intake up while keeping the calories down.
The most important thing I started doing was cheating. I know that is usually a bad thing to do but when I look bad on my dieting attempts, I realized there is a common reaction. After about two weeks, I start to feel deprived, cheat and then feel so awful that I stop dieting altogether! Once I realized that this was my pattern, I decided to build "safe cheating" into the diet to protect myself from feeling deprived. It's very simple. I don't count calories on Saturdays. I eat dessert on those days and don't feel guilty. What I noticed is that because I eat so healthy the rest of the week, it spills over into Saturdays. My cravings for junk food are reduced and one day of desserts is fine. It hasn't hindered my weight loss and keeps me from falling off the wagon.
All in all, I'm proud of myself for hanging in this far and truly believe I can achieve my weight loss goals now!
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone